T-Shirt Etiquette at Rock Concerts is Utter Nonsense

Tomorrow night, I will be attending my first real rock concert. I will be seeing U2 perform at Lincoln Financial Field in Philadelphia. I have been eagerly waiting for this date for a year and a half now. Originally, this concert was scheduled for last July. However, their legendary vocalist Bono injured his back during a rehearsal in Munich last May. As a result, he needed to undergo surgery, and the planned summer tour in the U.S. was cancelled. Needless to say, I was very disappointed. But none of that matters now. Finally, I am going to see the biggest rock band in the world perform live in my hometown. It will undoubtedly be an exciting and special night. I can't wait to hear my favorite songs, buy some souvenirs, and wear my U2 T-shirt proudly...

"WHAT? WEAR ONE OF THE BAND'S T-SHIRTS? YOU CAN'T DO THAT!"

That is what the collective voice of the Internet has been telling me for the past two days now. It seems that, like with most things in the 21st century, you can't go to a concert without following a set of ridiculous and pointless rules that have no plausible purpose. There seems to be about a hundred different versions of so-called “Concert Rules” floating around the web, and each version seems to vary from the others in one way or another. However, there is one rule that seems to appear on almost every Concert Rules list, and it goes something like this:

"Do not wear a T-shirt that mentions or depicts the musical act you are seeing. Wearing the T-shirt of another musical act, however, is permissible."

When I first read that, I thought it was a joke. "That can't be right", I thought to myself. This had to be some hipster bullshit that the "non-mainstream" crowd made up in order to make themselves look cleverer than the rest of us average Joes. I ended up asking everybody I knew if they had ever heard of this rule. The answer I got in return was a unanimous YES.

"Oh, don't do that"
"You don't want to be THAT guy"
"Yeah, that's a no-no"
"You'll look like a dork"

Now, I'm new to the whole concert-going scene. From what I've heard about them, they are simply supposed to be a fun time in which you can let loose and listen to your favorites bands perform live. I was unaware of the fact that there was a rock concert dress code. I went through the Catholic grade school/high school system, so I know about strict dress codes.

Wear the school uniform! Tuck your shirt in! No pins or buttons! No skirts above the knee! Sweaters in the winter, polo shirts in the spring!

However, there were days when we could wear whatever we wanted, called "dress down days". On these dress down days, I never recall being told that I couldn't wear something simply because it would make me look uncool. It sounds like these dress down days were less restrictive than the supposed dress code for a U2 concert. I mean honestly, when did people begin this practice? It's such an ironic concept that I can't manage to wrap my head around it. If I wear a U2 T-shirt to a U2 concert, I will be laughed at. If I wear a Smashing Pumpkins T-shirt to a U2 concert, I will be complimented. Where the hell is the logic in that?

Imagine how dumb it would be if this absurd policy was followed in other aspects of life. For example, what if everybody who attended the Phillies home games refused to wear Phillies gear? Picture Citizens Bank Park filled with 43,647 fans dressed in Padres, Braves, and Rangers gear. Would that make any sense? No! People wear Phillies gear at a Phillies game in order to support and recognize the team they are rooting for. The same goes for any other sports league. You'll never see Packers and Patriots gear worn to an Eagles home game, and you'll never see Heat or Lakers gear worn to a Sixers game (actually, you may, those two teams have poser fans in every city).

What if that policy was followed at political rallies? If you are an Obama supporter you cannot wear “Obama 2012” gear to his rallies next year, if you adhere to "T-shirt etiquette". If you want to look cool, you'll wear a "Gore/Lieberman 2000" shirt. If you want some really rad street cred, you'll go throwback and break out your "Stevenson/Sparkman 1952" shirt. Again, this policy is asinine.

Of course, there are those who try to give T-shirt etiquette a reasonable and logical explanation. According to these people, going to a concert is different than going to a sporting event or a political rally. When you go to a ballgame or rally, you're rooting for something or somebody that is competing against another entity. By wearing a T-shirt relevant to a team or politician, you are expressing your support for them. At a concert, however, there is no rooting or choosing sides (unless you are at a Battle of the Bands event). Therefore, you as a simple spectator have no real reason to wear a shirt depicting the act you are seeing. If you do wear one of the act's shirts, you are entering a realm of geekdom that is usually reserved for Trekkies and people who dress up as Hagrid for a midnight showing of the newest Harry Potter film.

However, I can counter that viewpoint fairly easily. There is nothing wrong with openly displaying pride and support in what you wear at a concert. If you disagree with that, you are probably a hypocrite. Because in all likelihood, you have worn red, white and blue on the 4th of July. You have also probably worn religious medallions when you go to your place of worship on Sundays. Oh, and if the company you work for requires you to wear a uniform with your company's name embroidered on it, you have sold out your ideology.

The truth is, people like to openly express their beliefs and interests, if not verbally than in symbolic ways. While you may think it is stupid to wear a U2 shirt to a U2 concert, you don't need to enforce that belief on others. When people wear those shirts, they are not trying to send a self-explanatory message to you. They are simply doing it for themselves. It's like a form of "Rock n' Roll Patriotism." Politicians wear the American flag pin as a symbol of their allegiance to their country, and concertgoers wear band related gear as a symbol of their fandom. T-Shirt Etiquette is over analyization at its finest, and I laugh at anybody who takes it seriously.

 I plan on wearing my U2  T-shirt tomorrow without any qualms.